Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Cruisin' By the Numbahs

Bullet points free of charge:

  • 0= the number of McDonald's I saw in those 7 days. It was heavenly to be free of the tyranny of those golden arches.
  • 0= the number of times I had actual hunger pangs on the cruise. I had "Hmmm, isn't it dinner time?" pangs. But actual hunger, no way, Jose.

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  • 0= seconds it took for me to adjust to cruise life.

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  • ?= days it will take for me to adjust BACK to my real life (I'll let you gize know)
  • .5= the number of shades tanner I am.
  • 1= time I barfed into the ocean due to sea-sickness while snorkling.

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  • 6-10= people who swam through my barf unknowingly.
  • 4= times I called home to check on the kiddies
  • 4= people I owe BIG TIME for taking said kiddies.
  • 0= times we saw one of the live entertainment shows and didn't giggle at the male dancers.
  • 7,000,045= cacti on Aruba. I was as surprised as you are.
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  • 2= souvenirs for the kids that were broken before we got home
  • 18= times I said "I LOVE our room!" as I either laid on the couch, went out on the balcony or watched one of the two TVs.

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  • 6= times the kids said "Is that it?" when presented with the remaining souvenirs
  • 4= famous virgin banana daiquiris consumed by the Landersons

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  • 38= times my skirt blew up on that deck onacuzza it was crazy windy.
  • 1= times some creepy old guy in the gift shop said "Sure is windy out there, huh?::wink::"
  • 5.5= pounds Gty & I each gained. That's ELEVEN ellbees between the two of us, people.
  • 2= washes to get Gty's pants clean after four-wheeling through the rain forest of Dominica.

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  • 2= dollars we spent renting those boots. Best $2 ever spent.
  • 9= times I almost died scootering through Puerto Rico with Hector
  • 1= Hector

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  • 40= years of blissful marriage celebrated by Phil & Milly

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  • 85= degrees average in the Caribbean right now
  • 7= degrees at the airport upon arrival
  • 3100= people our ship could hold

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  • 100= iguanas hanging out on the rocks in St. Thomas

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  • 47= Diet Cokes with lime consumed per day (minimum)
  • 45=minutes we had to wait before embarking because Milly "didn't dare not" check YES when asked if she had had diarrhea in the last 10 years.
  • 27= times I looked out of our balcony to see Phil out on their balcony (2 doors down) contemplating life deeply as he stares into the vast ocean (this pic was totally NOT staged, you gize).

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  • 9= total days & nights away from the kids
  • 1=dollar I had to pay this kids for looking at his creepy albino armadillo.

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  • 1= dollar we had to pay this lady for getting our picture with her (and her eyes are closed... what a ripoff).

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  • 522= our room number, Dophin Deck, portside
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  • 207= self portraits Gty & I took (some examples below)
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  • 2= of my favorite people in the whole world.
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15 comments:

Hazel said...

That is the most entertaining post ever! I felt like I was there, swimming though your vomit.
I love the self portraits too! The one with you both drinking from a straw has a certain Lady and the Tramp quality. Love it!
BTW-you owe me a dollar for the time I let you take a picture with me and my awesome hair.

Cristin said...

awwwwwwww I love numbers. And I love cruises, thanks for reminding me.

Jenny said...

Sounds like you guys had a great time!

Memzy said...

8-times I ell-oh-elled at this post. You guys are cruising people now, btw. Cruising is your thing. I can see it.

ps. whycome Gty must have that face in every self pic?

pss. you look HAWT.

Memzy said...

psss. are you growing out your hurr again? It looks niiiice.

E said...

Free trip to the Caribbean... priceless.

Posting a blog afterward using a numbers theme... brilliant.

eekareek said...

5-the number of girls who have commented so far.

It looked like fun but I am glad you are back.

Anonymous said...

nice post but srsly running into Katie at the Wal-shiz was hecka funny.

Katie: Anon, right? (when I'm not even looking at her but I'm wearing my namebadge from work)

Me: :::makes OH SNAP face :::

Katie: It's me from online

Me: You mean from TCCF.

Katie: ::: looking super nervous and freaked out and like she was on some kind of secret mission :: Gigglepallooza

for realz gize you should have seen what she had in her cart. I dunno WHO she had for christmas but they must love... um... yeah...

Carol said...

Now THAT'S a great post. The perfect way to re-enter the blogging world. Looks like a fabulouso trip. Question: not sea sick on the ship---but sea sick while snorkling? Explain.

Glad you're back.

Question #2: Where' the fake ponytail?

ManicMandee said...

What a hot little trip you had! It looked so fun and your room - wow!

Hot Pants said...

It's a good thing math is my thing. I totally got that post. And just so you know, I am TOTALLY gonna go back to shopping at WalMart now!

Elder Jack Anderson said...

AuntVisah: Q#1-- we had to go out to a smaller island on a little boat to go snorkling and the ride on the little boat got me going a little bit. Then the ocean was kinda rough so floating atop the waves with my face down and being tossed about like a piece of drift wood got me going even more. Then, I lifted my mask & took out my snorkel to get some fresh air (to settle my stomach) and I got a mouthful of salt water.... put me over the edge & I ralphed. I was super discreet about it though. I had to point it out to Gty & then he turned & swam away from me as fast as he could. We met up on the little boat later.

Q#2: I was way soooper sad when I realized I had forgotten my ponytail. I just stopped crying about it.

Memz, not growing it, not cutting it. It's quite annoying actually. Very blah.

AA, Katie was worried she scared you at the WalShizz. I assured her that was unpossible and then realized that maybe she was doing one of those things where she says you may have been scared but actually SHE was the one who was scared outta her mind. Then it made a lot more sense.

danandcami said...

1,000,000 I am happy that you had a great time! Some day I might make it on a cruise. We were going to go on one in February of 2009 but then Australia ruined that plan hmmmmm! :)

solidgold (a.k.a. our family) said...

1. I would do this cruise just to meet Hector.
2. Puking while your snorkeling and having other innocent fellow shipmate swim through it. THAT is Priceless.
3. It's physically impossible NOT to gain five ellbees on a cruise.

Unknown said...

Look at my skinny bro with his hot wife!!