My Take: Group Uno

Turn off the reverb machine!!!

Stop showing Ted Danson!!!

Why is Neil Patrick Harris there???

Drug test Pauler pre-show!!!

Let's begin:

Spandex: Worst outfit in the history of AI. I thought she was OK as far as performance goes but I don't know if it'll make up for that belt. Her personality is cute but I can see it getting tiresome if she doesn't learn when to shut her yapper.

Greg Braddy of Braddy Bunch Fame: I promise you I've never seen him before and I've been dissecting ever episode with a fine tooth comb. Also, at the end when they were showing everyone again I had totally forgotten about him. He's like musical oatmeal.

Pixie (Alexis Grace): There was this really annoying lady in South Carolina who insisted people call her daughter "Audrey Grace." So I can't entirely enjoy Pixie onnacuzza that, but I don't hate her. She may do well but I won't be voting for her at this point. It's cool that her dad is Meatloaf tho.

Dimples: Holy cow he's cute. And I thought his wife was his mom. It's unfortunate that I detest country music so much cuz this is apprently "the kind of artist he will be." But yeah, I could eat cereal outta those dimples and be just fine.

Stevie Sixteen Years Old: Sad. She's so gonzo it's not even worth discussing her here.

AnoopDawg: Love him!! If I could guarantee he'd be on the other end of the line I'd call tech support everyday! This song was lame (I barely even remember Monica) but his Bobby Brown ditty was aws. I also love him saying "If I may..." to Simon. So polite.

Winky: Awful. Again, not even worth typing out my thoughts.

BlueCollar Oil Rigger: Bo Bice did the best rendition of that song I've ever heard so he was sub par at best. Plus, I've already told you of my feelings about country music. Intolerable. Carrie Underwood did me a huge disservice cuz now these people are coming outta the woodwork. But he's a nice guy and nice guys do well in life.

AnneMarieBoa;kdtoeano: Lame song. She looks 50 years old. I had high hopes for her too. Unfortunate performance.

Forgetty: Did you know "Rock With You" is Memzy & Gty's song? Yeah, that's right. They have a song. Totally awkward, I know. I know the judges blasted him but I liked it. Also, if I were to have a fro, I'd make it like his. Totally looks healthy and stuff.

Tatiana: Is she in a pageant? "Multi-faceted" is an understatement. This girl has so many personalities it's like she has bees in her head. I was thinking earlier today that there is no way I could hate this girl any more.... I was so dead wrong. She tried to make it look like that song had drained her of all her energy at the end. All fainty and stuff. Jenny voted for her btw. So annoying. This is gonna be like Prop 8.... making people choose sides.

Robert Downey Jr's Little Bro aka Widower: Two words with hyphens-- Fan Fav-orite. He is gonna be sooooo hard to beat this year. He has everything going for him.... sad story, cute, nice, good singer. Forget Blindy, RDJ is where it's at, yo.

So there you go. My top three? RDJ, NoopDawg and Spandex.