Tuesday, May 4, 2010

AI: Eeka!! A Guest Blogger!!

If You Thought Landee Was Judgmental....

...I've got pages and pages of rude comments on the night. 

The first thought that came to mind when they said Frank Sinatra was "Ugh". Why in the world do they pick such boring old music??? Do they want me to hate the show??? Then they bring on Harry Connick Jr as the mentor. I didn't even know he was a musician. That is how popular he is in my mind. I also don't think bragging about being the musician for When Harry Met Sally is anything to write home about. That movie is OLD just like the computer HCJ was using to help arrange music for the contestants. It looked like this old "time machine" my dad used to have in our garage when I was growing up. Anyways, on to the contestants.

Aaron Kelly
Fly Me To The Moon

I bet Aaron peed his pants with excitement when he found out it was Frank Sinatra week. His hair looked fuller tonight and very fluffy but I noticed it didn't really move as he did his famous legs-apart-while-wiggling-his-body move. He sang the song just fine but it was a snooze fest. JEspy said it best when she said that she could hear that song on the radio today. On some AM station.

Casey James
Blue Skies
Love it when he pulls his hair back into a piggy tail. He looks less like Landee that way but it is better for him to not look like her. I actually kind of agreed with the judges about his performance. He didn't have his guitar and he did sound like a lamb. I wished he would have pulled out his guitar and rocked Frank Sinatra especially because his friends at home might start watching him this week. At least if he gets voted off, he will have $50 and a free meal from that gig with his friends.

Crystal Bowzersocks
Summer Wind
I love her casually starting out sitting by the piano and then walking over to the mic when the music started. She is so chill and casual. J/K of course. This girl has bugged me since day one. She was very stiff and only had one feather earring. Where was the other feather earring??? Did it fall out somewhere??? Randy said he wasn't sure if she changed it up. I guess that means that Randy had never heard this song before. I hadn't either. She didn't take her criticism very well either. She argued back and not in a good, funny way. It came across very whiney and complainy. JEspy said she looked like a two bit western whore in her getup, as well.

Big Fat Mike
The Way You Look Tonight 
I wonder what Big Mike's suit jacket looks like hanging on a hanger. It has got to be massive. Would it even fit on a regular hanger? Does he have to have special hangers for his suit jacket? I bet if he wanted to hang his suit pants on a hanger, he would have to hang each leg separately on their own hanger and then spread the hangers apart so it wouldn't wrinkle. His stylist would have to be very imaginative when coming up with ways to prevent his clothes from wrinkling. Someone as creative as Cinna, possibly. Oh, btw, his singing was whiney as usual. The judges loved his arrangement though, thanks to HCJ's 1940 music computer/time machine.

Lee Dwyze
That's Life
Lee is definitely the best of the worst. I don't how well he would have held up against Kris Allen or David Cook but against Crystal, Aaron, Mike, and Casey, he is awesome. However, I noticed he was dancing like Taylor Hicks. Moving around all stiff-like as though he needed to go big job. It was a bit distracting from his song, which was good. I think he needed some bag pipes in there. The best part of his performance was when Kara told him to write down "I Can Win" over and over and over again. It reminded me of this picture frame that Manic Mandy gave as a white elephant gift that had "I Love Me" written on it in puff paint. I L-O-Led when she said that. I can picture Lee writing in magic marker on his bathroom mirror that he can win. If he wins, I am going to write on my mirror in lipstick "Next Season Of American Idol Will Be Better".

My bottom three tonight are: Aaron, Casey, and Crystal

Going home: Casey :(                                              


michelangelo said...

i went to a book signing for the pioneer woman's cookbook instead of watching AI. and even though i was there waiting in line for 3.5 hours for my 20 seconds of fame with pw, i believe my time was better spent.

lee is the best of the worst. i have thought casey sounds like a laaaamb when he sings from day 1 back when he auditioned. i can't stand aaron or mike. i used to like crystal and won't admit to still liking her a little because i think you all would think even less of me, the interloper.

i don't care who goes home or who is in the bottom three. i'm gonna vote for whatever jespy picks. that way, my distance from the top will remain the same.

and now for my picks for next season...

Markie23 said...

I didn't watch it, and you know what? I didn't miss it. Nope, not at all.
So, I'm gonna wait for everyone else to pick before me, so I can make my selections based on the averages - after normalizing the data, applying a weight factor based on prior percentages, accounting for standard deviations and consulting the Magic Eight Ball.

Anna B said...

My sentiments exactlly.

Bottom 3:
Crystal, Aarron, & Casey

Bye Bye:

Can't wait till we can move onto

solidgold (a.k.a. our family) said...

I'm going with Casey, Dreads and Aaron. Going home might be Casey this week. I'm thinking the lamb comment didn't do him any favors. Who wants to be told they bleated?
(Although--he could try out for Wicked after this and bleat his heart out). Poor Casey.

Hot Pants said...

At the risk of being labeled groovy, I really like Harry. It's a risk cuz Kara is groovy, and I don't want to be like her. She reads The Secret.
Bottom 3 are, Casey, Aaron and either Mike or Dreads. I can't decide. Dreads sucked, but she has a following of man haters voting for her. Going home is Aaron. I'll get back to you about Dreads or Mike in the bottom three when my fast is over.

Jenny ESP said...

Eek--excellent guest blogging. Hilarious! And thanks for reminding me of the tune-in-Tokyo time machine. Bravo, bravo.

Bottom three:

Going home: Mike

StandsMom said...

I have a semi-soft spot for HCJ cause one of his songs is 'our song' for me and my honey. (:: collective "awwwwwww" ::)

All I could think of when Eeeeka wrote 'two bit western whore' was Reba McIntyre singing 'Fancy.' Remember that song? "Here's your once chance Fancy, don't let me down...." "I's gonna be a lady someday"

K, so my bottom three picks, which better be right cuz my score sucks right now, are Aaron, Casey and Crystal. And I think Casey is going home. He may be cute, in still life, but it's not so cute anymore. Blaaahaaahaaaaa.

Memzy said...

You already have my super secret picks.

This season blows.

Princess Kimi said...

Eek!!!! What an awes surprize!!!! You are so much more funnier/better at this than Landee! (I had to say it even tho it's totally true, but mostly just to bug u no hoo)

I was so freakin annoyed by the end of the show I can't even tell you. I was still bitter at least a 1/4 of the way thru Glee.

Bottom 3:
Aaron, Crystal, Casey
Going home to suck in private: Aaron (cuz I REEE FEWES to say Casey)

Put RodTodd down for
Bottom 3:
Aaron, Crystal, Casey...with Casey going home. brb. punching rt in the face part. jay kay if you are a cop.

Landee said...

First of all, Eeka!!! I'm forever in your debt. You are hilarious and, as Kim mentioned, you made it hard for people to miss me. I'm pretty sure no one did. Did anyone? Miss me, I mean? ::whispering:: Any....one?

Don't answer that.

As for my picks I'm going Bottom 3: Casey, Crystal and Aaron.

Going home: Casey. I blame Kara's sheep comment (which was painfully true).

Carol said...

I'd like to vote with Jespy--cuz she has the best record---but I'm going with Landeelu.
Bottom 3: Aaron, Casey, Dreds
Going home: Casey. He has NO star qualities.

Markie23 said...

Ok, I've tallied the results. Not a single person predicted that Crystal will go home, and I just can't let that stand. My votes:

Aaron, Mike, Mamadirtyteeth

eekareek said...

Landee, I will be calling on you shortly to return the favor.

Jana said...

Along with the legs spread and rocking, have you noticed how when the judges are talking to him he swings his arm(s) back and forth.

Bottom three: Aaron, BFM (Big fat mike) and Casey
Going home- Casey