Wednesday, March 11, 2009

My Take: Top 13

You put Blindy Blind Sis behind Randy?

Quit showing people in the make up chairs! No man looks good getting make-up sponged.

Paula wore a dead bird.

MJ Week? Best Theme EVAH!

The "new rules" better not give the judges any more pull in the competition. I hate big government.

Big&ROund: I can't wrap my head around the gravitational pull of her backside. It amazes me. I can't take my eyes off it. The high-waisted, pleated, tapered pants didn't help either. She's lame. She's nothing special. But that backside... I wouldn't mind keeping her around a bit longer so I can stare unabashedly.

Blindy: Thank goodness he was behind the piano. I feel much more comfortable with him there. Hawt brother alert at the beginning! Sounded better... but that isn't saying much. Is going nowhere this week. Cuz he's blind and stuff.

RDJ: The intro to PYT had me worried sick. SICK I SAY! And then he rawked it. I loved his moves. What were the judges talking about? I also appreciated that he made no mention of the wife in his little video thingy. He's not gonna play on the emotions of America (ahem Blindy).

Oil Rigger: Simon's best joke ever.... "I just wish we knew what you did for a living." How awkward are those blue jump suits, huh? Anyway, don't like him. Didn't like the song. Didn't like the cheese he applied to the song. Why must he smile on every long note? I'm sure he has a nice Carrie Underwood following tho. He'll be safe this week.

Jasmine: I'm still not a fan but I agree with Randy... "It wasn't that bad." She could be in trouble tho. Who would her fans be? No one voted her in. The judges brought her on in the WC show to fill a void of certain demographics. We might be saying bye bye to this Disney Princess.

CutiePatootie: I have a new favorite and his name is Kris Allen. Oh. My. Gosh. Could he be any cuter??? I loved the arrangement of "Remember The Time" with the acoustic guitar kickin. Made it his own, if you will. He has been married for only 5 months?? FIVE MONTHS? Poor girly. He's gonna make it big and leave her. I'm not rooting for that, I just read a lot of gossip magazines so I know how this goes. I'm heavily in like with him. We'll see if it turns into something more over the next few weeks.

Red: The clip of her singing to 4 people in that messican supermarket was sad. Depressing even. I've never heard the MJ song she chose. But then all MJ songs must be foreign to this little 16 yo so I can hardly fault her for it. I like her raspy voice but I worry about who her fans might be. I mean, I didn't vote for her.

NoopDog: Noopy, Noopy, Noopy.... what can I say? He has a hard time pulling the tough guy image off, doesn't he? I wish he would have sang Man in the Mirror or something along those lines. I do respect him for picking songs because he likes them rather than trying to figure out how to manipulate the audience.... but still... he needs to figure song choice out cuz I'm not ready to say good by to my widdle nerd.

Jorge From The Block: Wait, he needs a sad story in order to compete with the other sob stories on the show.... um... let's see... his grandpa died? Is that good? Grandpas are old. It doesn't count. Nice try Jorge. Did I see him bite his lip and sway? I did. Did I feel like I was back in the Caribbean on my cruise? I did. Did he take an hour explaining why he chose the lame song that he did? Yes. Hor-hay. Me no quiero.

ToddlerDancer: Is she human..... or toddler dancer? She picked to best song to show off her moves that I've become so fond of! She had me at "JBird Street." My only regret is that the camera would have been directly on her face when she cawed. I'm really mad at the director about this actually. She could be gone this week. Who is gonna vote for that?

Guyliner: What is with this guy? Why do they say Pixie was "over the top" but say nothing to this drama queen? I CANNOT STAND HIM. Can't. He sounds like he should be the lead singer of White Snake. He's all touching the crowd as if he's already won the freaking competition. The best is how his parents are totally average & June Cleaver-y and then he's completely yaped. I can't wait until he gets emotional (it'll all be an act tho) and his mascara runs.

Dueling Pianos: In extreme contrast to Guyliner, here comes Matt. Real. Subtle. Amazingly talented on the piano. Loved the JT comparison. Loved his song choice, obviously. Brought back some good Seattle Six memories. Loved seeing him back in his element.

Pixie: Is it just me or does she look like a Bobble Head Doll? I thought she sounded great though. I can't believe her 85 lbs can sing like that. I think Dirty Diana was an interesting song choice, not my favorite, but she can sing. It's unfortunate that Jorge took all the judges time to comment on her because I think they would have talked her up more.

Four Categories From Now On:

ToddlerD and Jasmine

Jorge and Oil Rigger

NoopDog (jay kay).... CutiePatoot, si claro.

Jorge. No question. Sadly, Noopy was a close second.


StandsMom said...

I agree that L'il is just a trick name. Yours fits much better.
Isn't it funny how Blindy behind a piano makes US more comfortable? If he does these inspirational numbers every week, I'm going to get REALLY sick of him REALLY fast. When he's wearing red, white and blue and singing the Star Spangled Banner, we'll know we're being snowed.
RDJ is SO CUTE! I love him.
Kris Allen was quite adorable too! I can't even believe he's married. He looks about 17 years old.
I'm SO glad Red cut her hair. Thank you for that.
Noop...are you kidding? I have to agree with Paula that some songs are just to iconic. Darn it. I really want Anoop to do well.
ToddlerDancer-Tattoo-sleeve-distracts-from-how-pretty -she-is; could that have been a more ridiculous song? I just don't understand.
Guyliner makes me throw up in my mouth a little.
Piano dude was great. I agree with all you said.(except the Seattle that some inside joke that I'm supposed to understand? If it's before me, I don't want to know :))
Pixie girl...I appreciated her song choice. Didn't love it, but appreciated it. I thought she looked good, but her dancing was this jerky weird thing that was really distracting.

Can someone just make Paula shut up? I'm so tired of her Miss Congeniality comments about how Wuuuuuuunderful everyone is. And she talks to long and then people like Pixie who deserve more get screwed because they ran out of time. I truly hope that Cara is really there to phase her out.

Our Family said...

Eyeliner super-bugs me as well. His Kiss impersonation with those high notes has GOT to go. Keep your tongue in your mouth dude.
Loved Kris. Did you see his wife when Simon made the comment about not showing her? She looked more than worried. I could just hear the conversation that night..."but Kris honey...will all these beautiful screaming sexy girls effect US? Maybe you should rethink this whole thing..." She looked terrified I'm telling you, and she should be honestly.
Loved dueling piano guy too. I'm really into those that have all around talent, except not so much blindy cuz he can't sing as well.
I thought this whole time that his sister was his gf, cuz they make a cute blind couple. Too bad. Here's my prediction for new rules: They have to vote on each other. Like Survivor.
OR just to make the competition fair everyone but blindy has to wear a blindfold.

Markie23 said...

Paula should fire whoever did her makeup last night. I looked like she was trying to cover up a beating.

Ok, here are the people I voted for last night, and the approximate number of times I hit redial for that person.

RDJ ~ 8 Cool guy, good singer.

Oil Rigger ~ 0 redials, but I thought this blue collar dude deserved a vote.

Red ~ 2 Love the raspy voice; I'm with you on the sad & pathetic supermercado appearance.

NoopDog ~ 12, 'Cause I like the guy, and he's gonna need those votes. He woulda killed with a tender ballad like Ben.

Guyliner ~ 5 Not that he needed them.

Dueling Pianos ~ 10 Maybe a man-crush?

Pixie ~ 20 Yep, I'm in deep smit.

Everyone else left me cold.
-Big & Round is the 8th world wonder with that enormous arse.
-Blindy is just not good dog.
Jasmine - buh-bye now.
-Cutie Patootie - personally I thought the guitar just looked like a stupid prop and made him look like some Disney Channel wannabe.
-Jorge definitely needs a sadder story.
-Utah girl should bring that cawing act to SNL.

I have no gut-feelings about who will be gone. If I had my way it would be Blindy and either Jasmine or Lil.

eekareek said...

I voted for Noop cuz he needed a second chance. The judges are getting it all wrong. I completely agree, 100%, about gayliner guy. He is crap and he is screetchy, like a barn owl. You don't notice the stage when he is on because you are too busy thinking "what the crap??!!!" He does not look like my Edward. Please mention that on your radio show. Also, I am so glad you mentioned toddler girls caw at the end of her song. I had to rewind to listen to it again because I thought my ears were being funny but nope, she a wierdo.

BTW, did anyone watch Biggest Loser last night? Naughty.

Memzy said...

You know it's times like these that I am soooo grateful for TV. It's a beautiful thing. I mostly felt sad for Anoop. But his hair trim looked fab. My new faves are dueling piano and cutiepie. But RDJ takes my heart every time. Be even sang "our song" you gize.

Jenny ESP said...

Ah, new header! Nice.

Lollerz @ Our Family's prediction. I just hope they don't let the judges decide who gets through, cuz they are a lil out of touch with the American peeps from time to time. Mr. Seacrest did say they were changing the whole concept of the show. What's that supposed to mean?

I voted for 5 people, as you know, all to different degrees.

Landee said...

The "CAW" was the best part of the whole show. So unexpected. I'm wondering if she planned that or if she was just "in the moment." Ya know?

Eeka, thank you for the barn owl bit. I might need to use that on the radio show.

OurF, ::singing:: Blindy + Blindy's Blind Sis sittin in a tree.... F-A-L-L-I-N-G. I'm wondering what the genes in their family must be to get TWO kids who are blind plus one hawt son. This is a geneticists dream case.

JESP, I actually don't know who all FIVE of your votes were cast for. I know one, due to your extreme currentness, but other than that I'm not sure. Do tell. And reasons why.

Memzy said...

ps. your new header is awes.

ManicMandee said...

I'm so behind on seeing this show I'm beginning to give up trying. But I kind of feel in the loop with your takes on it.

Jana said...

Ok, I think we just imprinted. I agree with you on EVERYTHING you just said. Why do people like Mascara?!? You are the only one I have heard saying they don't like him. And me and the hubs even said he's like an 80s butt rocker- and his tongue on the high notes appalls me. And I am also in love with Cutie Patootie, but I agree with Simon...why does he have to be married? It kills all my fantasies. Oh wait, I'm married too.
Keep up the good analyses. You're right on, right on I say.