Two Elton Johns and a Meatloaf? It's like they are trying to make me not watch.
Lil Rounds? LIL Rounds? There ain't nothing lil 'bout that backside yo.
Why DON'T the judges choose all their songs? I'd love to take song choice out of the equation.
Why does Simon pretend like he doesn't know their names? I don't buy it.
Gay Donny Osmond: I'd forgotten he had even performed by the end of the show. Not a good sign. There's no way he's getting through but I think he's decent enough.
LDS (?) GRL: I was so hoping for more. Can anyone confirm for me if she's LDS? The Mormons usually rally behind their own peeps so I wouldn't count her out. I threw her about 10 votes just on the possibility that she's Mormon. Do you remember how far Carmen got with her yodeling? Brook White? Jon Peter Lewis? That's right. They don't even have to be good to get voted through. We are a powerful people.
NerdBall: Anoop pulls nerdy off better than Alex. I like HIM as a person. I think he's hilarious. However, I do not like his fake raspy voice. His voice doesn't match his look. It's disconcerting. Sorry, but I like my socks to match too. I'm OCD like that. Sad eyebrows or not, he won't be going through.
Button: Self-proclaimed "cute as a button." Be serious. She acted like her being cute was holding her back. This is like those people in job interviews who, when asked what their weakness is, say "I'm just too good with people" or "I'm patient to a fault." C'mon. Then she sang some lamerz song and cracked the last note. Buh-bye, Button.
Ju'Not: I had to use his real name cuz, wha? You can't make this stuff up. He definitely took Hey There, Delilah and "made it his own." I'm just not sure I want what he's selling. I liked RDJ's friend's version better. The judges were ga-ga though. He has a shot.
Chops: She has the singing chops and did you see her teeth? Perfection. I want the name of her orthodontist for my kids. I don't want the name of her & Pauler's hair stylist though. I remember her drama from Hollywood Week and I remember liking her afterward. It was like she didn't cause the drama, but she was right in the middle of it. And srsly, this girl can sing. I loved her song. I thought she did great. She's definitely in the running.
Headbands: Even his Grandma gave him a mediocre review. She's "used to Nathaniel's music" apparently. I don't have many rules but one of them is that I don't vote for boys who wear headbands and sing Meatloaf. My standards are through the roof, I know.
2nd Chances: So apparently that super pretty girl who had had a record contract in the past but it didn't work out, finally got it to work out. She accepted a record contract and subsequently got booted from AI. This is where Felicia comes in. And you know what? I think she was pretty dang good. Did I vote for her? No, there's no hint that she's Mormon. Duh.
Blindy: Here is the question we need to be asking ourselves here.... If Blindy wasn't blind, would the judges even be giving him the time of day?? I say nay. They can't even bring themselves to criticize him. As a matter of fact, they praise him when it isn't deserved. You move mountains?? Kara, stop. Here are a few things Simon should have said, "Your vision sux and so did your singing" or "You sing about as well as you see" or even "You look like Art Garfunkle, but you sound like poo." But no. He's semi-blind. So he moves mountains.
Princess: Blonde. Cute. Country. Seen it. Heard it. Didn't buy their albums. Not interested. Her only redeeming quality is her Dad's alligator dance. I'm adding that move to my repetoire.
Jorge From The Block: In a shameful case of reverse racism, Flem will vote for him simply cuz he speaks espanol. He was the second Elton John casualty of the night. I don't know why Pauler was all choked up. He didn't touch me deep inside but whatever. I'm dead inside anyway.
Fantasia 09/Big Rounds/Huge Square: Ok, fine. She can sing. But I am so over these types of artists. They do NOTHING after the show is over. Never heard a peep out of LaToya way back when. Fantasia has done zero point zero things since winning. Jennifer Hudson? Never heard of her (jay kay). I just don't know if I can take another season of the diva. The judges want to make out with her though so whatareyagonnado?
Predictions are tough this week, you gize.
Boy: Blindy (cuz Americans are suckers)
Girl: Fantasia 09