Tuesday, May 25, 2010

AI: Thank Goodness It's Almost Over

I can barely bring myself to type something up here as my interest level has all but vanished.  But let's see what we can do...
 


LEE
 His Choice: The Boxer
 Producer's Choice: Everybody Hurts
 Single if He Wins: Beautiful Day


My little shorter, better looking version of the guy I dated Freshman year at BYU.  My little guy who I used to refer to as Zero Exposure because that is exactly what he got during the audition portion of this show.   My little parched singer... did you see those nasty saliva strings as he sang The Boxer??  Someone get that boy a drink fhs!  Gross.  I was thoroughly disgusted.   And during Everybody Hurts, the camera panned the audience and there was a freaking TELEPROMPTER scrolling the lyrics.  Did anyone else see that?  I've always been amazed at how these guys can learn these songs every week, and at the end they are learning several different songs....now I feel duped....bamboozled...speckledorfed (spongebob).  PS I guess they realized the original Idol songs were a bust, eh?  Beautiful Day was O.K.  Kinda lackluster though he did almost smile a little once.

 CRYSTAL
 Her Choice: Me & Bobby McGee
 Producer's Choice: Black Velvet
 Single If She Wins: Up To The Mountain

 Glad her unshowered, hippy look made another appearance.  It's always good to remind people how you'd look if it weren't for the stylists.  Yuck.  I've decided that her voice reminds me of how Kathryn Hepburn spoke.  Or maybe how Martin Short impersonated Kathryn Hepburn speaking.  Either way, it's choppy & e-e-e-e-h-y.  You know what I'm sayin?  I did NOT like her Black Velvet performance.  First of all, it was like she was building up the courage to walk down those stairs in those heels.  Then she waddled along like a man and sucked.  Jespy said she walked like E.T.  And I laughed uproariously.    But here is where it gets interesting.... I actually kinda liked Up To The Mountain.  I wonder how many other fence-sitters agree with me here.  That may have been the song that made it so Lee doesn't have a guarantee win on his hands.  Huh?  Huh?  What do you think?  Granted, her beyond lame & corny jokes at the end ("I'm beside myself...well, actually I'm beside Ryan Seacrest" and "Meows the time...") were a total turn off for ME, but there may be others out there who either didn't hear them or doesn't care about such things. 


So, on that note, I'm saying CRYSTAL wins.  Just to clarify, this is not what I desire.  I like Lee way better.   I just think tonight may have been the butterfly wings that caused a tsunami (if this season were at all as dramatic as a tsunami, that is...it's really more like the allergy in the air that caused a sneeze).

Pick the winner in the comments.  50 points for a correct answer.

Go.

Points from last week, btw:

Eeka: 40 (83)
Jespy: 40 (80)
Memzy: 40 (80)
Jana: 40 (79)
Landee: 40 (78)
Anna: 40 (77)
HotPants: 40 (76)
Flem: 40 (73)
cog: 40 (72)
Stands: 40 (71)
Mikey: 40 (69)
Stacey: 40 (69)
RT: 40 (68)
AV: 40 (65)
SolidGold: 40 (55)
Kimi: 20 (51)
Markie: 0 (19)

5 comments:

solidgold (a.k.a. our family) said...

I told my kids those saliva strings were rubber bands for his back teeth braces!!! He had them on both sides--so what was I to think? That's extra Gross.
Speckledorfed. Love it--
And the "Meows the time" thing made me picture her living as a cat lady with her neck brace harmonica thingy, playing to her 25 cats all over her room.
Who says that?!! Only cat ladies, that's who.

Memzy said...

Crystal.

Carol said...

I'm gonna pick Lee. Crystal was better last night but I'm hoping Lee has more fans.

Jana said...

I'm going with Crystal. Lee was boring.

Unknown said...

Lee has always been my favorite - some may disagree but I think he's better looking than Casey with that 80's buttrocker perm. You dated a guy at BYU that looked like Lee? Not bad...got a pic?

I agree Crystal is yucky. Comparison to ET in that black dress is pretty close. I was thinking more along the lines of Penguin from Batman. Duck waddle, black dress, even the teeth.

Crystal definitely had the better performance last night. But I really don't want her to win.

I'm going with Lee.