Wednesday, September 17, 2008

How About We Break with Tradition?

So, if you'll please notice, I had to change my banner at the top. Gty wanted me to take this picture off:


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He was like "You just want it up there because YOU look all cute... but I look like a complete doof." After some serious soul-searching I came to the conclusion that he is absolutely right. I don't think I'm alone in this business of only looking at myself in pictures to determine if I like them or not, but that does not make it right.

As a peace offering, I have decided to go through my pictures and pick out some of the most unflattering ones (of myself) that I could find. However, in doing so, I found a bunch that I love so don't be surprised if in the next little while I do a post of "All the pictures of myself that I LOVE!" cuz I believe in the yin & yang business of life.

So let's commence with the uglies, shall we?

Let's begin with Kindergarten:

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My posture, my smile, my extra long ponytail on the right side... it screams "delayed development" to me.

Next, this is maybe the beginning of 9th grade? Right before I got my braces on. Now thems are some TEEF.

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Now we're heading into some really unfortunate years for me. Ninth and Tenth grade were....not good. Those bang, while not big, are still very unattractive...and what am I wearing? A sailor suit? Geesh.

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This next pic was taken that same year. We were going to the MayQueen Dance. Ugh. I need to go back and ask Ethan why he agreed to go with me (it was girls ask guy, btw). Oh, and we were wearing our dates' bowties which is always awesome.

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Let's go to my senior year of high school.... I'm looking a bit... manish.

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Now college... YEAH!!!

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In our defense, LeeAnn was going on her mission very early in the morning. We had no time to shower. We were tired. So that's all in our defense. But tell me again why I look preggers?

Here is an unfortunate picture of me that same day, minutes later.

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Yup, it's the ugly cry. It was just because I was sooooo sad to see LeeAnn go on her mission & I was going to miss her sooooo much! And totally NOT because I had just seen some random little brother break down saying goodbye to his missionary big brother. Totally NOT that. It was the LeeAnn thing.

So now Gty & I are married and the pics don't get any better I'm afraid. On the back of this one all Memzy wrote was "Enough said."

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I have no words for the following...

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The next one was taken when we lived in Ohio... I had some of the worst hurrdids there. This one takes the cake though. I wonder if my hair dresser knew I was married.... to a MAN.

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General rule of thumb, sleeping pictures of adults are rarely cute.

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Um.

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Yes, I was competing in a family reunion log roll event, but that doesn't make it any more flattering, does it?

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In addition to the obvious, this one shows off my five-head in all its glory.

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Pregnancy pictures = never good. I have much, much worse ones, if you can believe it, from when I was preggers with JBird (why is the first one always the worst?) but I'm too lazy to scan them in.

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And finally, there is nothing better than a picture of yourself yelling at your son to stand up already so you can take a nice picture on Mother's Day.

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So there you have it. I can never be accused of only putting good pictures of MYSELF on here again. ::glaring at Gty::

19 comments:

Memzy said...

I think I look WAY cute in the LeeAnn going on her mish pic. ::snorting down the guffaws::

I am toadally going to make this a post of mine. Cuz everyone needs to see the nasty that IS the Memz.

AskMemzy agrees: It is always good to show people that you are human. And not the gorgeous model type that you portray.

Memzy said...

BTW, for all you readers out there who want to know what kind of cousin Landers is: When we got to BYU she saw a pic of my "Senior Picture Photo shoot" and named it.............False Advertising.

I only cried for three days tho.

Hot Pants said...

I wouldn't even waste my time with this sort of post. Any picture of me is a bad one. I like to think it is because I am not photogenic, but I am starting to think there may be more to it, after 34 years of bad shots.

Hot Pants said...

Memzy, maybe Landee should add her comment to you to her post about all the mean things she has said in her life.

Elder Jack Anderson said...

Just to be clear, I've said A LOT of mean things... that post was regarding things I REGRETTED saying.

I don't regret that cuz Memzy knows I heart her more than anything. OH, and she's a fan of that sticks & stones saying so we're all good.

You should srsly see that pic though.

::scanning in and emailing some unfortunate ones of Memzy I came across in my search::

Memzy said...

I could do some scanning and emailing/posting myself ya know.....so I'd be careful. One comes to mind of me and Flem cleaning the apartment tho. ::shuddering::

Elder Jack Anderson said...

No no... I would never post without your PERMISH! It'd be me emailing them to you with a note attached that says "Hey, if you're looking for some pics for your Unflattering post, you may wanna consider these" kind of a thing.

Hot Pants said...

Hey, when you used the example of someone posting a picture where only that said someone looked good, were you implying that the other someones in that particular picture didn't look good? Just wondering.....

Cristin said...

I've seen worse....that's why I try to stay out of pictures.

Elder Jack Anderson said...

Er....no? I can see how you might interpret it that way though. I was simply saying that she chose that pic because of how she said sh "picked this picture based on how adorable and thin [she] looks." There was no mention of how gorge you looked!!

But in my case, Gty did look like a doof.

E said...

I think you established that you have no "picture shame" when you posted that polygamist picture of yourself.

Gty just looked like his lawn chair folded up on him when you were standing behind and someone real-quick snapped the picture.

See, here's my blog picture theory. Anyone who's going to post a group picture on the internet, will always find the picture in which they look the best, and not even glance at the other two or three people in the picture, even if the post is a special dedication to the other people in the picture. The only decent thing to do is admit it up front. Besides, Landee would have called me out anyway. But, that picture was from a cruise we took, and Amy and Sara swore I looked fabulous in every shot while they didn't(<--not true) so I was also teasing them about that (meaning, flaunting it in their faces).

Last thing, just so you know, 90% of the pictures I post of myself on my blog are unflattering, and I don't add a disclaimer. The only thing I do is post a decent picture every now and again so people don't think I'm ugly all the time.

Here's your homework:

http://ajesplin.blogspot.com/2007/11/define-groovy.html

and

http://ajesplin.blogspot.com/2007/12/electric-fireplace.html

Both of those posts contain highly unflattering images of me, yet they are strangely flattering to my image. Does that make sense?

Memzy said...

I have a really good story about this exact thing happening with me and Shed. Except it involved our emgagement picture.

^I just laughed really hard out loud like for
1. It is really funny that he didn't put up a fight.
2. I am embarrassed beyond belief that I did that.

Memzy said...

^Somebody snuck in up there with a really long comment.

"it's electric"

Elder Jack Anderson said...

Memzy, are you referring to how tight Shed's pants/butt look in your engagement pic? Cuz I thought he wanted it that way on purpose.

AJ....I seriously cannot stop watching those vids. My stomach hurts from laughing. Will you bring that jacket to WA? I must get a pic of me in it doing something Twilighty. That's the grooviest freakin' jacket I've ever seen.

Memzy said...

^^I toadally forgot she wasn't around during the making of those vids.

Memzy said...

And yes Landee, that is exactly what I'm referring to. Not only did he go along with it, but he didn't tell anyone else how embarrassed he was about his butt.

Markie23 said...

scanning through pics

aaah, that's cute

Whoa

Oh, here we go

Oh, C'mon, that's cute

still cute

Oh, ok, well, I can see why...

Who died?

W O W

xxxx xxxx

pshh

amen

CRIKEY

I'm a steam roller baby...

YIKES!!

"Glowing"

"Now don't make me get a switch" <said in a strong Okie accent>

Chellese said...

I totally can't resist - this is the funniest post EVER. Can't agree more with the habit we all have of picking pictures of ourselves that we like while everyone else looks like crap. Your unappealing pictures crack me up. If I were to do a similar post there would be WAY too many in that pile.

BTW, I'm Lee's friend. We met a few times at the BYU.

Elder Jack Anderson said...

Mark, you just forced me to figure out how to set up this comment section side-by-side with the actual post. Phew! But thanks for commenting on each and every photo. Although I could have lived with out "xxxx xxxx" and "CRIKEY!" but w/e.

Chellese, I appreciate the comment & please stop by again when I'm back to my old self (aka only posting pics of me lookin' good).